Scratch Paper

I know you've tried writing something down in a piece of paper, scratch or whatever..
and you tear it out of your spiral notebook or from the red sticky tape that holds the pad paper together..
you then crumple it till you feel like every font you've written becomes unreadable - then you throw it somewhere, some place that no one would ever notice what you have written in that piece of parchment.

In that paper, you wrote down your deepest thoughts and your inner most emotions. Doodle or letters, poetry or just random notes..but all written from the innermost recession of your brain and your heart combined.

Unconsciously you crush it with your hands, tear and shred that piece of paper away even if what you have blotted down was that one thing you wanted to let the whole world know and just shout out loud so it would no longer bother you from inside - yet your too scared to even utter those words.

This is exactly what I want to do, write down my secret and my dream, the brainchild of my expectations, hallucinations and imaginary... and crumple them pretending it doesn't and shouldn't exist. eventually throwing them away for anyone not to bother read.

But as I throw that paper away, a part of my soul and heart comes with it.
Like I feel myself left with tiny bits of leftover torn paper parts from the red sticky tape or that spiral wire of my notebook from where i tore the paper where i wrote those words that I couldn't tell the whole world of.